Scewed, screwed... bloody screwed

Today was rather peaceful, a lot of alone time, both indoor and outdoor... and just when the day was about to end like... it's now about an hour and a half to midnight, i got a call from my driver ic saying that something really bad happened to the dog van. what is it you might wonder... accident? no. no fuel? no....
The speed warning device counter jumped. and that is a very, very bad thing to happen. yeah although my ic and i never drove that van ever since it was last checked, and obviously it was the other drivers' fault somehow... i made a fatal error of not checking the van on saturday morning. if i did and if it read the way it should, i would've been safe. fuck... first the tonner, now this. just had to let it out immediately... as if my life can't get any more worse, THIS has to happen. i'm nearly maxed out trying to deal with such stuff, let alone with myself too. and all the while i never seeked help, no one... i just couldn't. don't know why...why can't my life be more simple like my mind, i'm an under-educated 22 year old, facing money spending problems and has trouble communicating with the outside world thru face-to-face. right now inside, i'm feeling frustration, tiredness... and lonely. i can't even think of how to let myself out, this is just inadequate. who is willing to help me out here?! anyone? you, the one reading all these... can you help me please? just say something to me, someone. is it so difficult to ask for just one person's company... just one...