Inner confessions

man, what's the using of blogging when everday's the same... where my life seems to stand still indefinately. yeah yeah i'm a sad person, who's not? don't tell me everyone in this world is happy all the time... that's bullshit. i have no one to share my life with, to tell my everyday happenings of ups and downs, to make fun of and laugh with... a someone whom i can look forward to everyday. i consider those people who are attached really lucky, and they should freaking treasure it and not treat it as some past time, trend, or liability whatever. recent stefanii had a really huge quarrel with her boyfren, ended up having a short break of just an hour and they couldn't bear to be apart. now they're giving their relationship another go... hope it all works out for them. sigh, i always have feelings built up in me, and i have to let it out... then again people who hear or be my supposed 'listening ear' will say that why am i so negative blah shit... yeah i've seen better days, and that was when i had someone. all i need is someone who can be there for me... yes that sounds like i'm sooo dependant on people... it's the same as a sick disable guy who needs a nurse or fren to help him. i don't see a difference. you know how i feel? I feel like.... i'm just the same as anyone on this earth, it's just that i'm being seen so differently and misjudged terribly.
tomorrow i'm having my ippt, damn right i'm not gonna pass it and i'm so gonna be screwed hard for that.... yeah i'm ready for that. bring it on. you people may never understand my problems and what do you care anyway.

*exhale*... that felt good...